Lamentations - I feel like God has forgotten about me

 Hi Everyone,
I hope your 2025 has been better than mine. I hope your goals were accomplished and unexpected, good things have happened for you.
So we all know that I put it out in the universe that I will get married in 2025. Well it hasn't happened, and I am as single as I started the year.

I will just be honest, I feel everyday, and for the past several years that God has forgotten me. I seriously believe that getting married and having children is not hard, it happens when God wants it for you. I have seen over 97% of my friends get married and have children. So when I say its not hard, I am coming from that point of view. If something was hard, 97% of the people close to me won't have achieved it. Don't get me wrong, I am happy for my friends and family.
I will tell you this - people have mocked me. Satan's people have been winning.
I have fasted and prayed for many years to get married. I actually do not know anymore if I can say God answers prayers. It's clear that God sits in the heavens and He does as it pleases Him.  

I spent a good portion of yesterday evening crying and telling God how I feel - He has abandoned me, and How I think He hasn't been fair to me. Is here any good in living for God? Is there any good in waiting for marriage? Is there any good in fasting and seeking God's face? Is there any good in praising? Is there any good in obedience? Is there any good in praying? Is it all a waste of time that humans told us to do? God when was the last time you blessed me with something? When was the last time you blessed me with something I really wanted, and not allow the devil to add sorrow to it? Should I totally stop praying?

Yes, I know that sometimes I compare my life to others. Lord, whether I compare my life to others doesn't mean that You should not hear me. Papa God, these same people don't even glorify You, yet You show up for them. Am I going to be the mockery of people who do not like me? God, how can I praise you when these two issues are over my head every minute of my life. They affect everything in my life. God, are You going to be glorified in my life? Am I going to take a look over my life, and see your glory, love, kindness, favor etc, or am I going to see what Satan has won? Please tell me Papa.

In the story of Abraham and Sarah, Abraham once asked God -  “You have given me no children; so a servant in my household will be my heir.”. Papa God I am asking you the same - "You have given me no husband, and no children, will my nieces or strangers be my heir?"

I am publishing his today, a week and a half after I started writing it, and paused on that same day. So I lost my trend of thought.